If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
jump out the window naked night went bad
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
