Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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