You smell like a Billy Joel song
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
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