Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
