Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
