Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
