I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
