i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
im six kinds of drunk right now
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Randomize
