Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Randomize
