i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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