one two three fourrrrnication!
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
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