There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
