so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
