yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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