I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
