So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Randomize
