He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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