please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize