Me too!
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
