You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize
