Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
