i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Randomize
