So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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