? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
