You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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