So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
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