chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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