He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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