the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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