My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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