Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
