wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Randomize
