i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Randomize
