Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
