Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
