16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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