Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
