fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
