And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
