I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
