you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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