id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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