His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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