it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Randomize
