i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
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