I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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