I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
