I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
