I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
Randomize
