ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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