they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
